Real Talk: How Setting Boundaries Will Improve Your Relationships

Hi guys! Thanks to everyone who has commented or messaged me with topics you’d like to see covered here on my site. They always inspire me and I never forget them! Today I wanted to talk about the importance of setting boundaries – what it means and why it can be necessary for our wellbeing.

Real Talk: The Importance of Setting Boundaries - Tamera Mowry

It’s easy to think about setting boundaries when it comes to people we have a hard time with – like moving on from a painful relationship. But what about boundaries with people who want the best for you, with professionals in the workplace, or even setting boundaries with yourself? This is where it gets tough. Back when I shared my take on how to rise above negativity, I mentioned that sometimes we have to weigh the opinions and advice from people we care about.

If there’s someone in your life that seems to always have an opinion, that’s where setting boundaries comes in. If you’re thinking “this sounds uncomfortable” – you’re totally right. It could require a serious talk or even asking for space, which can be risky. But standing up for yourself doesn’t have to be dramatic or negative – you can say, “thanks for your concern but I need to handle this on my own” or “I could use some alone time right now, but it’s great to know you’re there” – and make just as much of an impact.

Some of you may also have trouble setting boundaries in the workplace. Considering we spend so much time at our jobs, your happiness there is not something to shrug off! It is so important to feel comfortable and secure at work. So if it’s a superior, a difficult co-worker, or any other relationship, make sure you are setting boundaries there too. It could even be something as simple as reminding yourself that you’re doing your best and that’s enough.

Lastly, sometimes we have to set boundaries within ourselves. Yep! All that negative self-talk you’ve been cycling through? Make a commitment to cut down on it (and eventually phase it out). Instead, practice transforming those thoughts into positive affirmations. Slowly, you’ll begin to respect your OWN boundaries too.

The hardest part about setting boundaries with people, no matter who they are, is not feeling confident in our authority to do so. As long as you realize that setting boundaries is necessary for healthy relationships, you will feel better defining and keeping them. And a funny thing will happen – people will start to respect them. And those that don’t? They probably don’t deserve your time or energy.

What does setting boundaries mean for you?

Xx,
Tamera

  • Establishing boundaries has been the best thing I could have ever done. I’ve always struggled with saying “no”, but I’ve found that I feel like my best self when I make decisions that maximize my energy and help me to re-energize when I need to.

  • Ina Turner

    In these times that we are living in, where we are expected to be tolerant of everything, and go along with everything! some time we don’t set boundaries because we are concern of what other think and feel about us>>especially if we are a people pleaser.
    It is so important for the health of ourselves and our family that others know,
    and sometimes it even include family members that you do have boundaries.
    Sometime others don’t know we have boundaries,because we have allowed them to do and say whatever they wanted, and we were not consistent in correcting them/or speaking up for ourselves,therefore they continue to step
    over our boundaries.
    My hubby and I have boundaries as to who can speak into/and or allow into
    out kiddos lives,we have boundaries who we allow to speak into our lives,
    and sometime that include even family members,we have boundaries around our marriage,who we take council from. I find that once boundaries are established and you are consistent people will respect it/ or leave, which
    is ok……but the key is consistent, because there is always that one/or two
    that think they know how you and your family life should be run and they
    will be stepping over that boundary line again,and again if you let them.
    Blessings……

  • Ina Turner

    Tamera, As someone that follow you on your blog, and always enjoy some of the topics<<especially the ones about improving/keeping a good family life.I find it so destructive to your family and marriage some of the things that come out of your mouth on your show<The Real..which I no longer watch
    because of that, and the topic about sex which you seem to gladly share is
    so unbecoming for a wife and mom<<seem such a contradictions to who you say you are. As moral people we must be accountable for the words that come out of our mouth, especially when we have kiddos that can go on the web and find things that we say or do even 100 years from now, that's the reason our children are so confused, because parents are confused and sinful.
    Be careful that the Enemy that is planting these thoughts in your heart,and the show does not ruin your beautiful family and marriage<>your marriage,your heart,your kiddos,your words,your thought life,your moral and accountable to the God that you serve…As your Co-host so Boldly and sinfully stated<< I guess you are open to new opportunities…NOTNOT. will be praying for you
    from a fellow wife and mom that LOVE the LORD and his people.
    Also think about your husband, he has co-workers that see and read this
    mess. Psalm “1”,Eph.3:14-21,Eph.6:10-18.You are working with wolves in
    sheep clothing<<check your bible and see what that means from the word
    of God..

  • Ina Turner

    Satan does not want me to share this with you,so he mess it up, but I pray
    God who I trust in that you will be able to read it, and understand what I am
    saying..