How to Balance Your Family & Career

It doesn’t matter what your job is or what your family is like – striking a balance is hard. Just because family means the world to you doesn’t make it any easier to step away from a demanding career. All types of careers require dedication! Remember, anything worth having is worth fighting for. So if you’re like me and won’t compromise when it comes to family or career, I have a few tips that apply to both, and reflecting on them should help you organize and prioritize.

Tamera-Aden-The-Real

Be Present

Many family relationships suffer not necessarily because one parent is gone too much at work, it’s because when they are home they’re not really present. Carrying work with you from the professional to personal space doesn’t allow you to give your full attention to your spouse and kids. In my opinion, the best way to balance it is to know that both work and family require quality attention. When it comes to spending time with family, there isn’t a set amount of time you should be sitting down with your kids at night or going on dates with your hubby. So whether you have an extra 20 minutes or two days to break away from work, make it count (here’s how I do)! Don’t check your email, leave your phone in another room, and really be all there.

Work is a little different because if there’s a family emergency, I’m there in an instant! But still, my career requires my passion and focus as well, so I have to remember that I’ve made a commitment to it and try not to let stressors from personal life bring down my quality of work. I love my job, so I usually find that even if I am stressed out for whatever reason, getting into character or doing something creative helps me to work through my problem on a different level.

Communicate

When Adam and I are both busy with work, we know it can get stressful, fast. We both want to support each other, but we also have other commitments that we know will fulfill ourselves individually, too. But you know what? After we talk about it, even though it may not change the circumstance itself, we both feel a million times better. Maintaining this open relationship with your partner can be the biggest motivator. After a good talk, you’re reminded that you can handle anything.

Value Your Time

If you’re reading this and feeling even more overwhelmed by thinking of how to balance work and family – remember this moment! As time goes on, try to focus on being present and opening the lines of communication with your family… but always come back to how you felt before. Time is precious and it can serve as an important reminder to refocus and redefine what matters. If in a month you still like you can’t strike a balance, it’s time to rethink your priorities. List everything that’s causing stress – are you taking too many projects on at work? Is someone in your family going through something right now that’s weighing on you? These often overlooked problems can also lead to permanent solutions. Hopefully you’ll find that these thoughts helped you to be present and communicate!

I will have to remind myself of it more often as we head into the holiday season. <3

Xx,
Tamera

  • Kristin Moore

    Great ways to keep things in perspective!! Thank you for this post Tamera!

  • Tamera…I feel like this blog is so necessary. I personally always feel like I struggle between the balance of personal life & work. There is nothing ,more important to me in life than my family. As a teacher, my work does not stop at 5pm. I love what I do but there are times where it can be difficult to set time aside and realize you can be abandoning your loved ones in the mean time. This article was such a good reminder of those components of” Being Present, Communicate, & Value your time”. Tamera, your such an excellent role model! Thank you for your hard work and being true to being you in a world that sends so many mixed messages! I love you on here on your blog and on The Real. I truly feel like I am your biggest fan lol. Love you and will always support you!
    Xx,
    Ida

    • shanmitch

      Thank Tamera for the encouragement! God bless your family.

  • christina jackson

    As a single mother parenting is very hard. Right now I am about to be without power, my car has been repossessed and I am about to have a nervous breakdown. You try to seek help but no one seems to know where that help will come from. Blessing and prayers please

    • shanmitch

      I am sorry to hear that… I pray your strength and blessings and favor from above. GOD BLESS.

    • Sorry to hear that… I will definitely keep you and your family in my prayers. We have a God of Hope and He will bring that to you! God Bless!

  • Jill Poser

    Thanks for your great article on work and parenting!

  • Jill Poser

    I also wanted to know if you and Tia are no longer doing your reality show? ! It was truly my favorite show!

  • Carmen Kadji

    you are a role model to me ! I love you so much. I needed a person like you to remind me how much women are needed in ths world love. God bless you and your beautiful Family !!

  • Melony White

    I am a working mom. I work a fulltime job while building my Breastfeeding Support Company for Afro-moms. In addition, I have a boyfriend and my 3yr old I adore. I find it hard to be okay with working so hard on my personal dreams because I went from being at home with my Little Person (LP) for a year and a half to working 40+ hours a week. Even though my hours increased slowly, I still feel sad to not be as available to my LP as I was in his 1st yr of life. Our breastfeedings have been replaced with singing, lots of book reading, and of course falling asleep watching movies- quality but different. I have made it a point to map out our household schedule for a full month! I plan a monthly mommy/son day, a date for me and my guy, as well as a hang out session for my guy and my LP. I do feel guilty spending so much time way from both my boys. The truth about Passion and Purpose is if you never step out and follow your heart, the light in your Soul dies out. I too am a believer of Women being capable of having it all. Communication, Love, Understanding, and Respect are all pillars in my household. God put us together for a reason and Love keeps the balance. Thank you for being a presence worth experiencing. #amazingLADY

  • Kathleen Aquino

    Thank you so much for this! Really puts things into perspective.

  • Paula Pierre Louis

    Great one. I will try it with my family.

  • Ina Turner

    Tamera, Again you blog on a topic that is so necessary, while so many of us work and raise a family,it is a constant balancing act between our family and careers,knowing that someone is influencing our children in their formative years is a very important matter to consider, also finding time to keep the honey in moon with your husband is another.
    While I take my commitment to my career very serious,BUT,I always know and feel that my first priority is to my family,that is what will last,brings me the most happiness,and at the end of the day the most joy. Always enjoy your blogs.Be Blessed,and continue to be a Blessing

  • So true! I work in government and my baby is in daycare. But I feel so sad sometimes because I rather be home with him. I’m thinking of taking writing to full time…but the government benefits for my fam is just too good. But I do appreciate this article! Thanks for the tips :)

  • Mellisa Tarisai Nhau

    Great blog. And very true.